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Rick Nash notched a natural hat trick to win All-Star MVP
Sunderland, Ontario, Canada
The annual CEHL all-star game took place inside the dilapidated confines of the Sunderland Memorial Arena. Due to the fact the arena could be deemed surplus by the local town council, Commissioner Williams took it upon himself to stage the annual CEHL all-star in his hometown to raise funds for a new arena floor and expanding the ice surface to regulation size. Rumours suggest all funds raised were promptly re-allocated to underground poker clubs and Scarborough strip clubs.
The West opened the scoring in the 1st when Crosby deposited the puck past Jimmy Howard with a beautiful deke after a perfect saucer pass from Rick Nash. The West kept the pressure on for the rest of the frame, outshooting the East, 14 to 6. In the 2nd period, the underdog Eastern Conference squad fought back. TJ Oshie beat Bobrovsky high glove side after flying down the ice on a breakaway. Next up, Erik Karlsson scored on a masterful lacrosse-like move from behind the net. When asked post-game where he learned the move, he was quoted as saying that he spends summers practicing ball hockey drills in Brampton with eccentric Devils GM Shawn Lawrence.
At this point, the West was down 2-1 and Commissioner Williams could not see his preferred West team falter in his hometown rink. He was seen pouring an unknown liquid substance into the gatorade bottles and this seemed to spark a Western comeback. What followed could be soon be made into a feature film. Blues power forward Rick Nash scored a natural hat trick and all three goals were setup in part to the wizardry of Sidney Crosby and Blues teammate Vladimir Tarasenko. Down 4-2 in the 3rd period, the East attempted to mount a comeback with an unassisted end-to-end rush by Logan Couture, why you ask? It's simple, because God hates Shawn Lawrence.
Asked to comment after the game regarding the water bottles, the commish had this to say, "I wasn't introducing any illegal substances into the water bottle. Sunderland water isn't really of the finest quality and I was just replacing it with some reverse osmosis water that I brought from home. This is a regular habit for me, just ask any of the guys on my pickup team. Party at my place on Saturday!" That was the end of the interview due to an appearance from a severely inebriated Dr. Richard Painter.